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Hmmmmm...Race Schedule...who needs a stinking race schedule?

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Du-Dum,Du-Dum, Du-Dum (menacing music)

So, the happy, nice me is mostly gone. No wonder I needed two-a-day workouts...the endorphins didn't last too much past lunch...or maybe it was the most obnoxious human beings in the world coming in direct contact with my edorphin-laden self. They then proceeded to suck all of them away by being presumptuous and rude. Or maybe I'm just less patient than I think I am. I just really don't like people taking crap off my desk without asking!!!!!!

Wow, on another note...two posts in one day!?!

Objects in the Mirror are not as Hopeless as they Appear!

Okay, so if you meet me today you may notice a vast improvement in my attitude today...the sun is up (not quite), the birds are tweeting (somewhere not rainy) and I went swimming this morning. Now before you get all worried that I broke the rules of the Witch Doctor let me assure you that I did not. I used a pull buoy (as seen in image above) to swim for about 45 minutes and let me tell you...those endorphins are humming again. No wonder they say exercise is addicting...hmmmm (sigh of contentment). I also used my new toy today...I had recently purchased an mp3 player for underwater uses. The headphones were little thingys that stuck in your ears...but...when your ears filled up with water as they inevitably do then the sound was blocked out. I was constantly having to stop and adjust them. So I figured it was time to unleash the big dogs. I got on ebay and found my new swimming companion...my SwiMP3 player. So it uses bone conduction to hear the music so it doesn't matter if water gets in your ears. It is WONDERFUL! And I hadn't even thought about it being Tuesday and some of the TNT folks showed up to swim as I was finishing up my workout. It was a twofer!

Anyway, I have to work today AND tonight so if you happen to see me at my place of business this evening and I am asleep on the counter...don't wake me up! I need to catch my "zzzzz's" so I can watch Glee when I get home tonight and still get up to swim again tomorrow. I am even feeling so good that I may or may not have planned a race schedule (that is dependent upon my recovery, of course) but it gives me something to look forward to!

1. July- Rockett's Landing- (this one may be pushing it...we'll see)
2. August- Pink Power Triathlon
3. September- Either Naylor's Beach or Patriots Olympic Tri
4. October- Giant Acorn Tri
5. November- Richmond Suntrust Half-Marathon (if I can't do the full at least I can aim for the half. I've never run the Richmond Half before...so something new...and a medal!)

I hope this isn't too ambitious! =)

Monday, May 24, 2010

Robin Hood...steals brain cells from the intellegent folks who paid to see this crap...

SPOILER ALERT...Okay, so I know most of you could care less about the historical inaccuracies that Hollywood perpetuates BUT I DO! I cannot believe I paid good money to see a movie that was wrong on so many levels...costuming, architecture and historical happenings...I was so angry I had to catalog all of this for posterity. I mean that is why I have a blog...so I can give my opinion and no one can stop me...but I guess I could bore you to death so you don't have to read it.

1. First of all, King Richard the Lionheart did not die before he returned home from the Crusades. He returned home to England to punish his brother, Prince John, for plotting in his absence. He did not die until 5 years later at the siege of Chalus. It was correctly displayed in the movie except he didn't die on the battlefield of his wound...it was a longer, more drawn-out death of gangrene.

2. Prince John's, later King John, reputation was ruined once Disney got a hold of him and made him a snivelling, thumb-sucking lion...but this movie continued the tradition and made him a stupid, selfish brat. Did John always make the best decisions? No. Did his subjects love him like they loved Richard? No. But he was a much better king that Richard. For the record, Richard only spent a combined time of a FEW MONTHS in England in the 10 years he was King. Not to mention the taxes he raised for his wars and the ransom raised to free him when he was kidnapped. UGH!

3. The French Princess (wasn't actually a princess at all), Isabella, was indeed John's 2nd wife. They married after he put his first wife aside. However, she was 12 when they married...so a lot less romantic than they showed in the movie. Although, granted she was supposed to be a hottie, even at 12.

4. There were no chimneys at the time the movie was set, so the blazing fires in the fireplaces that you can see in the movie are a sham. They would have had a brazier in the middle of the room with a hole in the ceiling for the smoke to escape.

5. KING PHILIP OF FRANCE NEVER INVADED ENGLAND!!! The only time it could be said that he ever came close was when he supported his son, Louis, against John right before John's death. In fact, King Philip of France was said to have once had a relationship with Richard but it did not stop him from conspiring with John to keep Richard from returning to England after the Crusades. Even more interesting, Richard's mother, Eleanor of Aquitaine taxed England to raise the ransom to get Richard free from his captivity...John and Philip raised money to pay his kidnapper to keep him. (that's why he is taxing and collecting money in the traditional Robin Hood stories...not because he likes to sleep with bags of money a la Disney).

6. Last but not least, John did in fact sign the magic Charter of Rights that his Baron's laid before him...it's kind of famous, you might have heard of it...it's called the MAGNA CARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did he try to nullify it, claiming he signed under duress? Yes. Did he sign under duress? Yes. Was it in order to untie the people to keep Philip from invading England. Um....no. Its because he spent so much more time in England, being a better King than Richard, that his Barons rose against him because they weren't used to having someone keep them from raping and pillaging the countryside. It was certainly not to give common people the "Liberty" they claimed was their right...that's a little much like "Braveheart"...whose inaccuracies would comprise an entirely separate post.

I am sure no one is reading this now so I can say whatever I want...so, I will say that history is interesting enough without MAKING IT UP! And two, my friend sent me a link to the pics from the wedding I was in last weekend and I could not have looked fatter or more disgusting. Ugh! =) And finally, I think I really do know way too much about English history for my own good...and yours.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Towelheads and Zoloft

What do individuals of Middle Eastern descent and one of the markets most popular anti-depressants have in common? Me.

Okay, so I am not a racist and do not really refer to any other peoples/culture in my title. I am literally referring to a person with a towel on their head. DRIVING DOWN 95N at that! And I know it was even more distracting of me to try to take a picture of it but it was just too funny to pass up. In fact, I had to try a few times to get a good shot of her and I am sure she could tell what I was doing. But if you're that late to work that you leave with a towel still on your head then you need to loosen up your schedule a bit. Try waking up, I don't know, 5 seconds earlier.

And I am not YET on Zoloft, but it might be a good idea since I have lost the tiny grip on sanity that running gave me. Seriously, who knew that I was this much of a mess underneath my endorphin-filled training schedule...I AM MISERABLE!!!!! And I am still not running...or cycling..or swimming in any manner that could be construed as actual exercise. It's so bad that I was parking in a full parking deck this week and had to go all the way to the top level. I was sooooo excited just to take the stairs...shhhh...don't tell the Witch Doctor. Speaking of the Witch Doctor, he says I am getting better and has given me corresponding homework...none of which involves breaking a sweat but here's to hoping, right?

And yet again, speaking of the Witch Doctor...I had a bit of a celebrity moment. So, I am laying on the traction contraption at Dr. G's place and I saw someone come in pushing a stroller and trailing small children...I thought she looked familiar. So, in a massive HIPPA violation (shhhh...don't tell the Witch Doctor), I checked the sign-in list and, yes, it was her! So I snuck back and introduced myself and apologized for being stalky but it was TMB!!! It is silly, I know, but it was like a celebrity sighting! I feel like I know her from reading her blog but I didn't at all until today! Woo-hoo! Sorry, TMB for that little invasion of privacy! =)
PS...to all of my 5, yes 5, thank you Jess for the clarification, readers...I would like to announce a fundraiser this evening at the Pour House in Short Pump. Its is for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and Team in Training for my training buddy (when I am whole and healthy) Sarah. (Click on her link to donate if you can!) She is an awesome teammate from my Augusta 70.3 team (at this time I would normally link to a race recap like any good blogger would do...but no, I am a bad blogger and never recapped.) Its funny, and not in a good way, that when I got involved with Team in Training I had little to no experiences with Leukemia or Lymphoma in my life but just needed help training for a triathlon. Well, my sister's father-in-law has sinced passed away from Leukemia and a good friend of the family was just diagnosed with Lymphoma this week. And while I don't know yet what her outcome will be, I know that I have done a lot to help already and will continue to do more as soon as I am healthy. TNT isn't just a good way to meet like-minded friends or get prepared for an endurnace event, although it is great for both of those things, it is also making a huge differences to the individuals and families affected by cancers of the blood.
Sorry to end on a down note but that could be the need for Zoloft taking over again! =)

Monday, May 10, 2010

Okay, I know I'm the Worst Blogger Ever...

Okay, so it has been waaaaay too long for me to be absent from the blogging world and my 3, or is it 4, readers have been missing me and my quippy posts...I will try a recap to catch you up on my last month.

1. So, I have lost enough weight to fit inside of my bridesmaid dress, but would love to lose a smidge more so it would be more comfortable...but since the wedding is Saturday it doesn't look as though that will be happening.

2. I had my first, and possibly only/last race of the year (see later bullet points for explanation although this may be a bit of a dramatic exaggeration). Brooke (of Dr. OZ and amazing weight loss fame) and I (of whining bloggy fame with 3, or maybe 4, readers) did the Muddy Buddy and made team Running our Masses off proud! It was hot, muddy and a lot of fun! Next year we will be super svelte and super fast! Watch out Dirty Birds, Team Hoo-Yah and Mother Daughter Slaughter! We're coming for you!!

3. I am BENCHED! The Witch Doctor said I had to stop running, oh and everything else...FOREVER. No he didn't really say exactly that but that is what I heard! =( I have gone through periods of time in my life without running (ie: all winter and the first 26 years of my life, to name a few) but this last weekend has made me INSANE because I can't. I mean I could if I wanted to ignore sensible doctor recommendations...I could run and it would hurt but I would finish because that's what I do...but I can't! I am trying to be a sensible, sane adult who listens to what educated, medical personnel suggest. So, besides the fact that I just seriously scolded one of my co-workers for daring to open his mouth in my presence, I'm doing okay. (and this is the very nice co-worker who brings me his People magazines after he and his wife finish reading them and had just dropped one on my desk just minutes before I yelled at him! I am a terrible person!!)

I need some Prozac or something....